Now that I have Zum home, I am practicing all the many techniques I learned while riding Zum in the round pen everyday. Some things I have to start over with Zum. For example, Zum will not stand still for saddling anymore. So I am working with him again, from the beginning.
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Buddy rode his horse in the round pen, trotting ahead of me. It brought back the memory of Zum bucking me off when a girl trotted by me on a horse. I couldn’t breath, my heart started to pound and I had a panic attack. I wanted to get off Zum but Buddy talked me through the fear, helping me to breath as I sat on Zum and Buddy sat on his horse. Buddy later told me the experience I had is called deep fear therapy. I got through it and I was elated that I survived. Buddy keeps telling me that anything before this present moment is ancient history. I need to look around me at the birds, the sky and the desert. Keep my mind in now by focusing on what is happening at this present moment.